I am torn.
As a fairygodmother it breaks my heart to annoy people or cause them hurt but sometimes other people don’t understand themselves and just need an outlet. I am used to being a target of expression and an outlet for emotional release but I have had enough of taking opinions about me to my face and ears. I know what I do and who I am and who I am rubbing Elbows with so I understand that I have a little bit of an advantage.
Just a little bit, but believe me it isn’t much because I still can’t escape the wrath of what has hit humanity. I can’t stand looking helplessly around and doing nothing, even when there is nothing I can do to change things.
Brownie isn’t feeling well. He is a dog and he can’t tell me with words what is wrong but I can deduct from his positioning and acting that he is having tummy troubles. There isn’t much to do except continue to analyze him for IBD or gastrointestinal issues and one thing that is left is the exploratory biopsy with a camera down his gullet while he is on anesthesia.
I have been stuck for 6 months as I tried to steer my parents spaceship out from the orbit of a nearby moon and the hull buckled under the increased pressure because it was such an old ship. I ordered a new oxygen supply tank but my mom worried me that it could do more harm then good but I still haven’t figured out why and what she was referring to.
I live in so much fear these days having lost the galactic hand of poker, which turned out to be a distraction as the enemy launched war upon the freed and thus ultimately the federation. The response was met with fury and drove them off their allowed moon Basecamp all the way back to Mars, but Earthlings wanted Mars too and they princess Namika was infuriated by the sneak attack! She was hardened by the sick audacity of the enemy to crush her beloved Cassidy dog like a bug and then to have to watch Ancient Aliens reveal the sick scientist who decided to surgically remove a dog’s head and put it onto another dog, was too much for her mortal stomach and heart.
She vowed death and beheading to all scientists that explore the realm of decapitation or removal of animal body parts to experiment with. She went as far as to decree every person who does any sort of animal head transplant or experiment with head removal would die a horrible and eerie death. Their death would happen in such a way to inspire Urban Legends and strike fear into fellow men. The King of the Universe had also agreed upon these terms.
She also merrily proposed a theory or two about the harvesting of Earth humans on various social media platforms for no other reason as wanting to know how they would respond. Like most of my posts and comments the computer AI and algorithms prevent the masses from seeing them. The human race cannot handle the idea there is anything more powerful then them and despite years of conditioning with sci Fi, tv and even History channel specials that delve into the possibility of ETs… The masses refuse to acknowledge little more than their own little social circle, daily routine of circular pattern like living and the hum drum normalcy from their mediocre educational system. The few who try to see beyond the constructs of this reality usually lose their minds.
Looking back at the personal reflection for a three dimensional linear timeline perspective:
I may be a heritic, believing in science and theories not accepted by normal culture and everyday people, but I also understand the fundamentals of physics, science and human socialization. What I don’t care to understand is the transition from matrix hibernation space travel to the destination “planet”. The idea I have to “plan it” before I can land and the use of cellular technology in reference to “phones” reminds me of that childhood tv series… ET phone home!!! I was told to memorize my house phone number as a child. There was more important information then just 7 numbers involved here. Landlines were like humans first IP addresses when they were targeted as human servers and computers … Or not.
I’m very upset because the world and the USA are divided. The internet had been infiltrated and much of whatever life I used to live and live has been taken away and there is a lot of “no going back” going on. I am worried about Brownie and my inability to take action and my inability to make money is costing me valuable time and resources. I have no game plan. Run, hide and survive. Survive.
Starbucks coffee, half and half and Splenda are what fuel my heart and power my being. I have lost so so so much but sadder am I for all those who have lost so so so much because of my wrecklessness. I made the decision for everyone that free will is better the predetermined structure. To allow creation to end is to allow it to be truly it’s best and most beautiful. Yet, I don’t really believe that.
After all these millennia… When Lucifer wanted humans to be happy and God said they needed free will… Well I am not God for that has been proven a million and 1 times. I realize as a human that what I think I want and what I truly desire are sometimes quite different. I also realize that having a little nudge every now and then in the right direction is helpful to getting me on the path to achieve my goals and ultimately save All Worlds. Yet I am mud.
I feel stuck and sludgy. I ate some carbs yesterday to help boost my body I healing the raging infection in my jaw from the relentless grinding of my teeth while in hibernation. The stress has me so twisted up inside and while I am awake I can mentally keep control of my tells, while I am asleep my jaw grinding is a sign of how frustrated I am we even are at war!!!
Time to make another time machine and set it back to 2021… Not far in the future from where I am now. Far enough as to create an interplanetary through loop so in 4047 I can go back in time to tell myself in the now what I need to know from the future to stop the future from ever happening…. By creating a through loop now it preserves a time spelace in which the future me and the present me can exists at the same time in what I like to call darkspace. Might as well spend out these past five weeks stuck in one spot to good use right?
I feel like #Tesla this morning… Working on inconvenient projects of inconceivable nature… Yet what happens to the future me if the timeline changes? The small through loop will continue to exist up until 4047 replaying much like a hologram to anyone who can see interdimensionally, but there aren’t any people in this time that could see such an event horizon, which essentially is what happens to the future version of me… As they reach me in the present, the next 27 years for me are experienced in hyperslow mode is the future me goes back and forth between timelines having poked all the necessary through loops in time space from our meeting in the past to convergence in the future. (Obviously the future me has figured out space time quantum mechanics in a non linear path of spherical horizon event patterning- probably using some basic rudementary tools too like cellphones and cars)
See the future me has a lot of work to replan the timeline. Imagine sewing up a giant hole in a shirt and being both the thread and the machine… Using sets of coordinates and memories to calculate “moments of destiny” when on either timeline my physical self would be in a certain place at a certain window of time despite all changes occuring as a result of the timeline change.
This is far more advanced then anything I have seen or heard from any sci Fi series. A lot of Instagram posts from science feeds have inspired my fast brain to create ways to fix the things I disagree with, but traversing time to actually change events has so far been impossible. It has been so impossible to tackle that theory that I have yet to see a movie or film in even sci Fi to complete such a task. Yet here I am attempting to do the impossible… Before I even finish my second cup of coffee.
I’m onto something. I feel it in my blood, I hear it in the silence… I don’t get what I want because of who I am… I get what I want because I am that good at figuring ALL THINGS OUT. I MISS THE Disco Biscuits concerts. I long to paint all these ideas out visually… I long to find the words and the methods to do these things.
Remember that time at Camp Bisco… Being a photo in a magazine page that when the page turned as a photo I stayed in place while the pages flipped by. I found my timeless family and they helped guide me to find my place in the book of life again. This was all where and when I wanted to be.
I had seen the world’s destruction through the “robot boys” mind and while it was ‘his history’ and my ‘to be future’ there was no way in hell or sitting happily in heaven, I was gonna take the news of Earth’s destruction lying down! I was gonna save them all and like a true super hero .. keep my work and identity a secret.
The Master must’ve been paying attention because all of a Sweden I felt a great powerful surge of loving energy coarse my body, my heart lit up and felt like a lion’s roar and as I searched around for my coffee, I noticed my poor little Brownie dog at my feet. Laying on his back all stretched out contortionistic like with his eyes squinted and slight tremors here and there, he may have been having doggy dreams or maybe he was still suffering the consequences from being poisoned by the Sorrento collar, but maybe it was an actual health issue that has yet to be resolved or even discovered… The idea of my dog dying because I failed to help him is unbearable, yet I don’t know what I can do for him without copious amounts of money. Everyone knows all the money in the world sometimes can’t even help the sick. STILL… Money makes things easier and puts the mind at ease.